im smelling his blood!so close to me..

Hmm..
What can I share now?
I'm so grounded!
I feel like killing someone.. An old fucking bastard exactly!
I can't stand it anymore. Really need some killing equipments.
Ohhh damn, what do I suppose to do?
Soooooooooooo confuse. Sooooo grounded! I wish killing someone isn't a sin.
I desperately want to kill that old bastard! Damn!!!!
Helpppp me! Help meeee.. Calm me down..
Somebody please help me!!
I even can't help myself.. Since I'm a moody girl.

Ahh, betapa kangennya gw nulis" di blog gw..
Since I don't have much time to post this thing. I'll try to make it fast. ;)
From where should I start?
Hmmmm.....
Mungkin gw akan mulai dengan hal" yang paling uptodate dari gw..
1. Gw lg berencana menguruskan badan sekitar 7 kilo.
2. Gw pengen liburan bareng someone special gw which is my monkey!
3. Akhir" ini gw lg depresi karna suatu penyakit yg aneh. It kills me!
4. Akhir" ini hidup gw lebih berwarna karna my relationship is actually getting stronger
and stronger.

Ok mungkin itu adalah gambaran update tentang gw akhir" ini. Dan berhubung saat ini adalah bulan
Desember yg notabene akan menjadi bulan terakhir di setiap tahunnya dan sebentar lagi
New year's coming! Yay! Makaaaaa dari itu, gw ingin membuat sebuah wishlist
dan planning kecil"an buat menyambut Natal 2008 dan Tahun Baru 2009.

Daaaan inilah wishlist gw :
* ingin keadaan berjalan lebih baik dari sebelumnya
* ingin tambah dewasa pastinya. Ga childish lagi!
* I want to be a better person absolutely! Who doesn't?

Dan itulah wishlist dan planning gw.. Ga muluk" kok! Hahaha

Yaudah ah, cape ngetik. Haahha dadahhhh..
XOXO

sebuah curahan hati!

hmm.. mau mulai dari mana yaaaaaa?
ceritanya panjanggg bgt sihhhh.. :(

okeee okeeeee
beginiii ceritanyaaaa..
akhir-akhir ini hati gw lagi ga beres bgt.
sediiiiihhh terusss
ga tenangggg..

penyebabnya yaaaaaa gara2 akhir-akhir ini gw lagi ngerasa jauuh bgt sama temen-temen gw.
mungkin bukan mereka yang ngejauh, tapi gw yang ngejauh.
gw pun ngejauh bukan tanpa alasan kok.
gw ngerasa ga nyaman aja sama temen-temen gw.. yaah, mungkin karena gw takut juga kali.. takut mereka ga bisa nerima keadaan gw yang sekarang.
hmm, tapiiiiiii...
sekali lagi gw pengen bilang, ini hidup gw..
mereka semua berhak ga setuju, berhak buat komentar, kasih saran, apapun lah..
tapiiiiiiiiiiiiiii..
ya gw berhak dong ngambil keputusan kaya gini? mereka juga kayanya ga peduli dengan keputusan gw? mereka fine-fine aja..

susaaaaaaahhh temenan sama orang yang GA NGERTI arti persahabatan sesungguhnya, yang GA PERNAH ngerasain serunya kebersamaan, yang GA PERNAH ngerasain susah bareng disaat temen lagi susah!!!!!!!!!!!! gw kesel.. gw nyesel.. kenapa masa-masa SMA gw laluin dengan amat sangat PLAIN! gw pengen SOMETHING kaya waktu di SMP.
pengen dihukum bareng-bareng 1 angkatan, cabut brg..
semua kebersamaan ga perlu kok dibayar dengan kemewahan.. yang penting semuanya ngerasain seneng!

GW BENCIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
GW NYESEL......


boleh kan kali ini ajaa gw nyalahin keadaan??

just random things

hari ini bener" tersiksaaaaa..
gara" makan lidi yang superpedessss, gw jadi poop darahh.. arrgh.
kesel dehh..
trus yang bikin makin nyiksaaaa, gw mulesss terus, jadinya ga berenti" poop. huh.
makin sakitt aje ni pantat.. astagaaaa!!

kangen dana..
kangeeeeeeeenn sekaliiiii..
padahal kemaren baru ketemu. huhuhu
tetep aja kangennn..

hmm,
what can i say about mylife now?
ASIK GILAAA! hehehe
senengggg bgttt..
dari tgl 20 april 2008, udah ada orang yang nemenin hari" gw. dan gw berharap ini ga akan ada akhirnya. karna baru kali ini gw ngerasain nemu "the one" nya gw.. ga ngerti juga ini karna emosi sesaat apa gimana, tapi jujur aja gw belom ngerasain kaya gitu sebelomnya.
walaupun hubungan gw sama dia banyak ditentang dari sana sini, tapi gw mau tetep berjuang dan berusaha buat hubungan ini. gw terlalu sayang untuk nyerah gitu aja karna dia adalah sosok yang sangaaatt amaaaat pantes buat diperjuangin.. :)

LOVE YOU,K!

thankful

hari ini cuma mauuu posting ttg betapaaaa bersyukurnya gw karna gw akhirnya dipertemukan dengan seseorang yang bisa mengubah pandangan gw tentang segala hal.

i believe there will be a way for us. amenn..
baru kali ini ngerasain sayang bgt sama seseorang sampe kaya gini. sampe ga berani ngebayangin kalo gw uda ga sama dia lagi. huhuhu.

sebelom"nya gw belom pernah ngerasain sayanggg bgt sama cowo sampe kaya gni. gw ngerasa kali ini relationship gw bakal beda dari yang lain. padahal pertamanya, gw ga yakin sama hubungan ini, karena gw pikir dia ga bakal serius juga sama gw. akhirnya gw ga berani untuk jujur sama perasaaan gw sendiri. tapi semakin dijalanin, gw semakin ngerasain sesuatu yang beda dari dia. makanya skrg gw ngerasa bersyukur bgttt karna dia bisa jadi bagian dari hidup gw.

I MISS YOU ALL

HIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...

lagi sebel. lagi sebel.......
ga tau kenapa. pokoknya sebel...
ga jelasssss bgt nih. kacau total perasaan gw.. pengen ngamuk. tp ga bisa!!!

KANGEN HOUSEMATES YANG PASTIII..
lagi kepengen ketemu and settle down di suatu tempat yangggggg cuma ada anak" pandan valley. huh.
pengennn pelukkk housemates. hiksss..
gw bencii bgttt perasaan kaya gini. perasaan kangennn!sedih, pengen nangis.

METTA..
ERVANIE..
UUY..
MENONG..
PAMELA..
UCHAY..

I MISS U ALL..

pengennnnnnnnnnn cerita" kaya dlu lagi.
pengen masak" bareng lagiii.
pengen supper barenggg..
pengen order kfc pas exam.
pengen ke cafe del mar.
pengen ke MOS barengggg..

everything seems so blur

hari ini lumayan seneng, setelah 2 hari begadang" nungguin telfon dari seseorang. huh. anehhhh.. kenapa juga gw musti nungguin telfon dari dia. berharap-harap cemas sang handphone bakal berderingggg?? padahal kan gw udah tau, kalo hpnya dia ketinggalan di mobil temennya..

oh iya, sekedar mengupdate info..
kemaren ini gw akhirnya memutuskan untuk bilang sayang ke dia. aaaaahh..
semoga ini keputusan yang bener.
walopun pasti banyak pihak yang kecewa dengan keputusan gw ini. maaf kawan"..
gw janji, semua resiko, semua kesedihan, semua kesenangan, dan semuanya bakal gw telen sendiri. gw ga mau ngerepotin orang lain lagi.

kemaren kelas komputer bareng sama dia..
senengggg.. duduk sebelahan. tsaaaahh!
pokoknya senengggg..

anyway..
gw baru perna ngerasain sayang sama cowo yang bedaaaaaaa TOTAL dari gw.
dia sangat percaya ramalan bintang sedangkan gw engga
dia percaya love at first sight sedangkan gw engga
dia hitam gw putih [looh?] kok jadi rasis??
dia kriting gw lurus
dia jago nyanyi sedangkan suara gw pas"an

huaaaaaaa..
sayang dia
sayang dia
sayang si kriwil lucuuu..
sayang dwi dana putra masli.

i need a refreshement!

why it turns back so fastttt to me?????

kenapa cepettt bgt semuanya balik lagii ke gw?
sungguuuhh kutaksiap.
tapii sejujurnya dihati kecil gw, sebenernya gw uda sangat siap.

gila.
badan panas dingin
panas dingin
panas dingin
ga menentu..!! bencii nih keadaan yang kaya begini. ga jelassss..
sebenernya sih gw sendiri yang membuat segalanya serba gajelas kaya gini.
so blamed me! ahhhh..

okay okay.. lets make a confession.
gw suka
gw sayang
dan gw sebenernya udaaaa siappp ngejalanin semuanya.
laluuu? sebenernya apa yang ngebuat gw ga bisa ngungkapin ato mungkin belom berani ngungkapin ini semua ke diaaa?
mmmhh, jawabannya mungkin karna i don't believe myself.
gw takut gw bakal salah.
yap.. itulah alesannya.
bodoh? mungkin aja..
mungkin gw emang bodoh.
manusia yang takut untuk tersakiti.
yaaah.. bisa juga gw ga bodoh. karna apa? karna siapasih yang mau tersakiti??
ya gaaa???

alesan klise bgttt sih sbnernya..
karnaaaaaa everybody loves to love and being loved! and being hurt or hurt someone else is the risk of love!!!!!

ingin berliburrrrr... !!!!

warna warni dunia. :)

bingung..
dilemma..
pusinggg..

ya ampun..
ga nyangka.. akhirnya perasaan2 itu kembali mewarnai hari2 gw..
ahhhhhhh..

ok, lupakan sejenak ttg warna warni perasaan itu..
easter break ini kayanya bakal seru ni.
tadi pagi bokap nanya2 mau kemana gitu..
bokap sih pengennya ke bangkok. tapi sayang banget ga sih? masa ke bangkok cuma 3 hari? akhirnya bokap gw usul ke pulau bintan.. gilaaa, masa ke riau?? jauhhh cuy..
akhirnya muncullah setitik ide di kepala gw, ngajakin liburan ke pulau umang.. :)
ada perlawanan sih dari nyokap gw gara" nyokap gw tuh phobia pulau.. aneh bgt. cuma that's the fact. sebel bgtt.. pokoknya mustii berjuang niii supaya bisa kesana.
uda banyak hal" seru yang malang melintang di kepala gw kalo jadi ke pulau.
ciaaaaaaaaaaatt.. inginnnnnnnn ingiiiiiiiinnn inginnnnnnnnnnnnnnn... :)

tiba2 kangen banget sama metta + erv..
kangen tidur barenggggg..
roomies oh roomies..
kangen kaliannn..
kangen housemates juga..

what a confusing day

emmpph,
hari ini aga" males kemana" ni.
mustinya hari ini ikut acara siaran prambors.. di campus playlists.
tapiiii.. i can't make it. i cant work my ass to get there. huhu

guys, akhir" ini gw lagi bikin rencana buat bday blast gw ni..
pengennya pas hari H-nya, gw pengen bagi" sedikit kebahagiaan ke anak" jalanan yang mungkin belom seberuntung gw. tapi buanyakkk bgt kendalanya yahh kalo mao berbuat baik? arrgh. gw kekurangan pasukan ni.. alias kekurangan kru buat bagi"innya. soalnya anak" greja pada kuliah.. cuma gw doang yang OFF.ahh..
tapi gw dah janji sih, bakal doing anything buat ngelaksanain keinginan gw. :)
as u know, im a lil stubborn girl.. so, i'll do anything to achieve my goals. in positive ways yaaaa tapii..
trus rencananya, malem"nya pengen ngajak anak" greja makan".. pengen ngajak anak LS makan" juga. tapi pasti dipisah lah.. ga mungkin bareng". hahhahahahha
hmm, ada bbrp resto / cafe yang uda jadi top lists gw buat acaranya..
1. gelato bar
2. tomodachi cafe
3. kemang food fest
4. KOI kemang
5. sushi tei
6. etc etc

oiya, gw punya wishlists buat bday gw :
1. pengen ditelp sama housemates and friends di singapore
2. pengen ditelp sama itin
3. pengen have fun seharian!
4. iPhone
5. ke pulau umang or bali or sumwhere with nice sunny beach

gw cabut dulu ya..
mau nonton plus dengerin campus playlist. :)
nanti malem baru posting lagi..
ciaooo..

that's true.. the meaning of VEBRINA. :)

What Vebrina Means

You are very hyper. You never slow down, even when it's killing you. You're the type of person who can be a workaholic during the day... and still have the energy to party all night. Your energy is definitely a magnet for those around you. People are addicted to your vibe. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are full of energy. You are spirited and boisterous. You are bold and daring. You are willing to do some pretty outrageous things. Your high energy sometimes gets you in trouble. You can have a pretty bad temper at times. You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

my name's recipes by blogthings

The Recipe For vebrina

3 parts Fun 2 parts Beauty 1 part Intellect Splash of Rebellion Finish off with whipped cream

What's the Recipe for Your Personality?

i should be born on february

Your True Birth Month Is February

Sharp Ambitious Spendthrift Loves reality Loves freedom Temperamental Low self esteem Honest and loyal Abstract thoughts Daring and stubborn Changing personality Showing anger easily Intelligent and clever Loves aggressiveness Quiet, shy and humble Learns to show emotions Rebellious when restricted Determined to reach goals Superstitious and ludicrous Dislikes unnecessary things Realizing dreams and hopes Too sensitive and easily hurt Loves entertainment and leisure Romantic on the inside not outside Loves making friends but rarely shows it

What's Your True Birth Month?

envy me?

People Envy Your Ingenuity

You're a person with unique ideas, big plans, and a zany outlook on life. Many people look to you for inspiration. People envy your creativity and "who cares?" attitude. They feel very ordinary next to you - and they usually are!

What Do People Envy About You?

pistachio flava

You Are A Pistachio Ice Cream Girl

Funky. Surprising. Wild.

What Flavor Ice Cream Girl Are You?

weehee.. me = thanksgiving

You Are Thanksgiving

You are a bit of a homebody who enjoys being in the company of people you love. It doesn't take a lot to make you happy. You're enjoying life as it is. You have many blessings in your life, and you are grateful for each one. You believe that life is about what you *do* have. You feel like you have enough of the good stuff. What makes you celebrate: Family, friends, and the changing of the seasons. At holiday get togethers, you do best as: The host of the party On a holiday, you're the one most likely to: Spend so much energy preparing that it's a full time job

What Holiday Are You?

i'm an apple

You Are an Apple

You are strong, powerful, and even a bit stubborn at times. You have enough strength to help those around you in trouble. You are adventurous and charming. Many people are drawn to you. You love life, and you enjoy traveling the world. You enjoy fine food, art, and culture. People have accused you of being a snob, but that's not accurate. You do enjoy the best things in life. Unlike snobs, you truly appreciate quality... not just pretend to.

What Type of Fruit Are You?

personality by blogthings

You Are An ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverent, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're quite the storyteller! In love, you are quite the charmer. And you are definitely willing to risk your heart. You often don't follow through with your flirting or professed feelings. And you do break a lot of hearts. At work, you are driven but not a workaholic. You just always seem to enjoy what you do. You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist. How you see yourself: compassionate, unselfish, and understanding When other people don't get you, they see you as: gushy, emotional, and unfocused

What's Your Personality Type?

*LOMOholic.. whaaat?

ya ampun, ni hari bener" kaya masa penampungan informasi tentang LOMO!! googling terasa sangat bermanfaat kalo lagi stuck begini..
oh iya, belom ngasi tau, jadi ceritanya tuh gw lagi tertarik bgt sama LOMO. iya LOMO. L-O-M-O. kamera dengan plastic lens gt. dan kenapa juga gw tertarik dengan kamera model begitu?? ada bbrp alesan, yaitu karena LOMO itu unik. flashnya bisa multicolor. ada lensa fisheye,pinhole. duh, lucu bgt d. trus bentuknya dan seriesnya yang unik2 bikin gw jadi tambah penasaran sama si LOMO ini. hehehe

my LOMO wishlists :
1. diana F +
2. holga multicolor
3. fisheye 2 white

dari 3 lomo itu, gw paling pengen sama diana F+. keren bgtt asli dah..

rencananya sih sabtu depan mau ke aksara kemang buat nanya" seputar lomo sekaligus beli kalo emg uda ga tahan.. hahaa
hmm,, bingung pengen beli semuanya.. tapi belom begitu akrab sama fitur"nya.
aga contradict juga sih antara keinginan dan skill yang ada. hehehehe

ngomong" lomo, ini hari gw baru ajaa balik dari bandung.. (apa hubungannya lomo sama bandung???) hahahhaa anyway, trip ke bandung kali ini aga beda.. kali ini gw memboronggggg apapun yang gw pengen.. aga gila memang. tapiii, itu bukan sekedar kalap mata, tapi emg karna keadaan yg mendesakkkkkkkkkkk buat melakukan kegilaan tsb. hahahahhahahahahahhahahhaha lame reason! heckkk..!!! beberapa pasang sepatu pun ikut menjadi korban kebrutalan belanja gw.. entaaaaahh..

dannnnn guyssssssssssss,,
baru" ini ada sedikit perasaan yang uda lamaaaaa ilang dan ga perna meramaikan kehidupan gw lagi tiba" muncul begitu aja. hahaha. bingung juga kenapa, yang pasti gw berharap perasaan itu cuma sesaat, krn gw ga mau terjebak dalam perasaan sesaat tanpa logika. hahaha ya beginilah gw.. lebi suka mempertimbangkan logika ketimbang perasaan kalo untuk urusan cinta.

sambil nge-blog gw sambil liat" fs temen" sma..
tiba" kepengen ngebuka salah 1 fs temen gw, sebutlah dia dengan MG.
dannnn.. ketikaaaaaa sedang menatap foto" si oknum ini, tiba" gw inget sama kejadian sama dia gt. gw inget bgttt dia perna ngomongin gw dibelakang bersama dengan the weirdosnya.. cih! padahal dulu, kalo abis rapat osis, gw suka nganterin dia pulang.. gw ga perna ngomongin dy di belakang, and i did NOTHING to her!! heeeckkk!! yasudahlah, dia juga uda ngaku salah bersama dengan the weirdos-nya..hmm, cuma gw trauma dan ga mau lagi percaya apalagi temenan sama dia. ahhh.. pokoknya gw keselll.. tiba" jadi berasa pengen marahhhhhh.. arrrrrg.

sebaiknya pembicaraan ini disudahi dulu ketimbang menghasilkan dendam dan amarah membara..

a whole new world

.. while enjoying my lavender tea..

feeling so bright..
without any reasons..

ni hari ujian logika.
ya ampuuuunnn.. soalnya bener" diluar LOGIKA.
masa ada soal ditanya tinggian kelurahan apa kecamatan. duh,, ngasal bgt dah jawaban gw. ahahahaha
moga" aja jawaban asal gw membuahkan hasil.
bsok ujian lagi.. kali ini aga berat, Public Relation.
yang bikinnnnnn males tuh gara" lecturernya, si MR.Rudy Gobel, yang ngajarnya ribed abis.

sambil nulis ni blog, gw sambil nyari lirik lagunya a whole new world..
dunno why, lagi pengen nyanyi tu lagu aja. hihihi

Unbelievable sights
Indescribable feeling
Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling
Through an endless diamond sky

actually, gw suka aga" geli sama anything romantic.
tp ni hari lagi aga" mellow aja, jadi yaaaaa it's ok to hear a romantic song. :D

this is a new ME

well, this is me again.. :) it's been an ages since my last post.
now the things are different from the last post. i'm in my lovely hometown,JAKARTA,now.

uhm, blamed myself for my decision to back for good to jakarta.
actually, from the bottom of my heart i feel very comfortable in my own lil house. and now, i go to London School of Public Relation . i got so many friends, but there's only 2 persons that i get along with.

their names are NIESYA ADITTA HUTOMO and MICHAEL MEIDIANTO.
so far, our friendship is going well. i think i love them more than i thought before.
they like a new family for me. i can share caring with them back then i never do that thing again since the first time of my suck high school.

okay, forget about high school. lets talk about the 'now' things.

guys, hari ini ada berita dukacita.
mantan presiden SOEHARTO udah mangkat.
selamat jalan pak harto..
terima kasih buat semua jasa"mu..

oh iya, lately, gw lagi aga" kepengen enjoy a long vacation ni.
pengennya sih ke pulau umang ato ke tanjung lesung.
moga" aja sih kesampean.. amiiinnn..

ngomongin hari ini,
gw hari ini memulai kebiasaan overeating gw ni.
hari ini aja gw makan masakan menado dari resto beautika.
mana dinner pula, jadi feeling guilty. :(
for dinner, gw tadi makan :
1. cumi woku
2. ikan tude
3. sop ikan asem [lupa namanya]
4. sambel dabu"

ni hari ga sempet keluar kemana" coz gw ada final exam bsok.
bsok final exam logika. harus belajar ni supaya bisa!!

doainnnn gw ya.. :D

okay, try not to be any longer.. i'm out!

ciao!

God Bless..